Apologize, Forgive, Reconcile
Addendum: Since I posted this, I've gotten even more comments. I'm going to address two of them, up here at the top, as they sort of frame the whole thing, and in case you've already read this, you don't have to go back through everything. First, only you can control you. You can't make someone apologize, or forgive, or reconcile. That's probably the hardest part, because we (and that's not the royal we, I'm exactly the same way) want to focus how THEY have wronged you and how you wouldn't have done that horrible offensive thing but for THEIR actions. When we use the third person, though, we aren't taking our own responsibility for our actions, or really even our own emotional state. "THEY offended me" means 'they' have the ability to do something to you. You however CAN apologize, CAN forgive, or CAN reconcile, or at least do your part on that. Note how that removes THEY entirely. Thus, the points below are all about...